You are still young!

I ran into an old friend after many years at a coffee shop. She looked ravishing; her daughter looked at me with inquisitive eyes.

“How old is this cute one?” I asked offering her a chocolate

“She is six.”

“Such a cute angel! So what’s up with you?”

“I am working with a multinational bank…Vice President”

“Wow…Good for you!”

“So what are you doing here alone?”

“Alone? I am with my daughter.”

“I meant where his father is?”

“I am a single Mother.”

“Ok…” I could not muster the courage to ask why…widowed, separated, adopted child, live in gone wrong…………?

And then the unthinkable happened, words just slipped from my mouth “You are still young!”

I bit my tongue not knowing what they meant, the years spent in a patriarchal society made them come out subconsciously? I could read from the expression on my friend’s face, she was appalled. She must have been taking this from colleagues, neighbors, acquaintances and even some from the family; but she did not expect this from a progressive friend she thought I was.

“I am happy.” She said tersely.

“I am sure you are!” I added with a smile, I could see it.

Too embarrassed of my remark I changed topics and soon the tension eased. We went on to discuss latest movies, Vero Moda dresses, Olive oil recipes and Gol Gappas…We exchanged our phone numbers; she was not active on any social media due to paucity of time. She had her work commitments and wanted to spend any free time with her daughter. She wanted to travel around the world with her!

Am I progressive? I mulled as I drove back home…Have I subconsciously absorbed the deep rooted stigma that a woman needs a man to survive? Do we need the father, brother, boyfriend or husband by our side? Especially when I saw her with a child, I was concerned if she would be able to pull it off? The idea of being a single parent can be daunting for the individual and has bizarre reactions from the society.

You have to fill in the shoes of not a person but a person of another gender. Men and women are not conditioned to be alike; more so in emotional situations. While we go gaga over a single father doing the same job, shower praises, offer him help and distinctly identify his “motherly” side; we are a little harsh when it comes to women. Single Mother is eyed suspiciously if she is doing well and seems happy; she is eyed lecherously if she seems vulnerable. Well-wishers and friends like me want to see her settled with a man. Are we really concerned that the child will grow up without a father figure? …Possibly but not truly. Though we may give the above statement as a reason to her (as this is the best argument one has); but in our mind we cannot picture her happiness without a husband.

Mother is a mother…she needs nobody to complete her. If she is a single parent and fulfilling her duties towards the child and if they look happy together; we have no business to think she needs a man. Teach your daughter and sister to be independent; if they want to walk out of a marriage they must not feel the burden of society. Children are little angels and they do strengthen the bond of marriage; but let’s not make them scapegoats in any arrangement.

If one day she does find a man with whom she thinks her paradise is not lost, let her be the judge and say “I am young!”

Match made in heaven

I tried to get some rest before the big day tomorrow. For months I am getting battered and bruised with all the practice that Saurabh does each single day. He has not bothered ever if I am a little worn out on the sides, I am the favorite.

There is still time and I am reminiscing the first day Saurabh took me in his hands at a mall. Among all my friends, I was chosen by him. I am not a narcissist but I knew my worth then and I know it now. Among all of us who were batch mates, I just knew I was better and I was made for bigger things. I had the perfect look and a most enviable BMI for sure. I also thought I was just in your face handsome, nobody could have ignored me. Saurabh could not ignore me either and I could not ignore him too. A perfectly athletic body and a charming smile, he was made for me. No sooner he set his eyes upon me and picked me out, he was smitten. I can tell that, I have had that effect on several people by now; but probably they were never too serious to pursue me; or Saurabh and I were destined to be together forever. He admired me from side to side, took me in his arms and convinced his dad that I am the best (not that it required much convincing!). We were home and I was quickly in his room and he held me at different angles and admired “us” in the mirror. Soon dad came in with some linseed oil and he and Saurabh gave me a little touch up. Man! I was special, but this was too much!! When Saurabh and I faced the mirror again, I was gleaming. So far so good, I thought excitedly. They are going to cherish me. But what followed soon after for several days did shatter my pride and also made me aware looks seldom matter in the real world and only “real” people know this….…

The good looks and outer beauty that I so admired in me was put to test for some knocking sessions. Hell why did I forget that??!! I have to be toughened to face the world, I mean good looks aside I need to be strong, but this much? He took me daily with him but just spent time with me for worthlessly hitting the ball to a wall and back. How could he? I mean of course I was getting hurt physically, but that I took in stride on the pretext of getting tough. But how could he let me feel left out, on the sides when he played a real game. That hurt my pride. I am certainly better than the other one with him. He would take me in his arms after a really long day and say “Soon”…

That soon was sooner than expected and we were in a big field together, Saurabh and I. And did we have a (the) ball literally?!! We played like there was no tomorrow, so much so that the day ended with a win for our side and me by his side forever. Many such feats followed and day by day we became inseparable.

I was brought back from my trail of thoughts by the loud shrill of the alarm. She is a noisy one!

Saurabh collected all his stuff and was about to step out when his Dad entered. “All set?” “Yes Dad!!”

“I have a surprise for you” he said teasingly to Saurabh. “Surprise?!” He asked cheerfully.

“Yes, a present, can you guess? What it could be”

“Dad, several times I have told you, I am bad at it, both guessing and waiting for the surprise. Tell me, pray tell me please.”

“Tada!” And he produced a new set of gloves while I heaved a sigh of relief, like you all did as I am sure you like me by now.

“Wow! They are lovely. Thank you Dad. Love you!!” said a doting son.

I think he almost worshipped his dad. I had seen in his room photographs of Dad with trophy in his hands and all team mates literally on his shoulders. I had heard that story many times from Dad; how he single handedly had “shouldered” this win and trophy and how all of the team were so proud of him. He also narrated how he could never get past this match due to family responsibilities and settled for a regular office job.

“In those days, sports were not big son. In fact I used to save money to play and travel by public transport for hours and then we could get that Inter College Trophy. Now it is all up to you. I am so happy that you not only have the same talent like mine but similar bigger dreams.”

Time had come, first time that I would play a Duleep Trophy final. Today Saurabh and I had to prove our mettle, not only ours but of the benevolent father whose dreams we set out to fulfill. Saurabh walked in the middle of the ground to call the toss. “Tails” he yelled as the coin did somersaults in air till it fell down and so did Saurabh’s face; it was heads. We lost the toss. I could see how disappointed Saurabh was. Many believe winning the toss is already good luck, “well begun is half done” they say……….

The other team chose to bat, nothing new with that. These days any team that wins the toss bats first; at least most of the time. Ok so I have to sit back and watch how others do and what I can learn about the pitch, field and even the umpire. It was good wicket and it seemed that runs came fairly easy. Saurabh appeared fairly tense and my heart went out to him. Our team fielded well but nothing was too impressive about the bowling to write home about. The bowlers gave easy runs or so it seemed from the VIP stands, from where I was watching. The one thing about cricket in India is; for the onlooker the game seems fairly easy and players (especially ones in limelight) fairly foolish. Everybody gives opinion on a lost catch, an “easy” six even a random wide ball. As if those on the ground sweating it out care less about the game than thou.

They finished it off at 243 for 4 (Ok I know you are used to the world cup scores of 300 runs, but those don’t happen here, these matches are tougher. With less money, fame and name; what lies at stake is a dream to play for the country and so everybody give their 200%. Amateurs could have concluded that our side did well!)

The dressing room was far from chaotic, an eerie silence prevailed. Coach and Saurabh were in a corner talking animatedly. The team sat in a huddle but no one spoke. They looked up to their skipper for some encouragement, strategy and even admonishment cause they themselves were still recovering from what had happened few minutes ago.

Saurabh came back and spoke in the easy charming voice (he will one day be like Dhoni I tell you, Mr cool!) “Guys! I know we all gave our best and this match is as important to you as it is to me or Dada (Coach Bhattacharya, all fondly called him Dada). Dada thinks we could have bowled better, but I was there and I know this was the best on this pitch. I now rely on Avi and Maku to do some magic and just hold on for first 20 overs. Don’t risk it till then. After that just judge and go for bigger hits. Everyone, I repeat everyone should play as if they have no tomorrow and have to not throw away the wicket. Just be cool and also do not react to any sledging. Am I clear?” No one said anything. So he repeated “Clear guys? Be cool, we are going to win.”

“Yes!!” they yelled and hugged Saurabh. I think the word win had them. The hunger for winning keeps all of us ticking (except for that alarm clock that ticks and ticks for irritating me with a shrill alarm!).

Saurabh was not the opening batsman (you know that by now!), not that it made him any lesser but just letting you know that it would be some time when you can watch us in action. He came one down, at number three. It is the most important spot I heard. From Rahul “Wall” Dravid to Virat “Dashing” Kohli all belong to this spot.

The first five overs were heart breaking for our team. Their bowling and fielding was excellent. We scored only 13 runs. That is bad. But from sixth over both Avinash and Mayank came to life, they tried to maximize the singles and we even got a four per over! Till 9.2 Overs we had scored 41 runs. Saurabh and Dada both looked happy. Mayank was facing the bowler, and I could see his bat swing hard and looked at the boundary to see if some fielder would collect it and stop a definite boundary; but wait; the ball is not there why is the other team dancing? Ok I see it now the leg stump was down. How, when? What a ball!! Poor Mayank, he was playing so well! This means it’s my turn. Saurabh is padded and I am in his hands. God please don’t fail me, us.

We came down to a loud cheering I could see Dada and Dad both had grinning faces to encourage us and I could tell from this distance Dad’s eyes were moist too. Saurabh was composed. The first two balls he ignored them, he is settling, I know. The third one I nudged, I am also settling you see. Last ball we gave a moderate hit to score a single. I know Saurabh wants Avi to face maximum balls as he is playing strong. Is that not what good captaincy is all about? So Avi and Saurabh took some time to build on their partnership. By 25^th over Avi was batting at 46 and Saurabh at 16. Why is he not letting me hit it out? He is playing too “cool” for comfort I could have yelled! At 25.1 over, while we were happy to have not lost wickets a big blow came for Avi. He got caught while trying to hit a bouncer and lost on the opportunity of his half century. Ravi came in quickly. I like when Ravi and Saurabh play. Ravi and he have an easy camaraderie and I have seen them finish so many matches! Ravi never needed to settle down. He was on the job from the word go! They played cautiously and knew the score that gaped at them from the billboard was not easy to come by. Over 37.4, we are playing at 165-1 Saurabh is batting at 48. And we smashed the next ball for 4. I did it; I mean we did it, Ok! Ok! Saurabh did it; half century!! He kissed me, hugged Ravi, looked at Dad, thanked Almighty all of it in a flash. He knew this is not enough. We have to win the match, he said it aloud to Ravi and for the umpteenth time I felt he actually meant the words for me. In the over that followed, Ravi could complete his half century too and all was going well. But the 40th over was a nightmare!! Ravi got run out. First time I saw a miscommunication between these two. What makes it worse is that Saurabh faltered here. But this is a game and it must be completed, no I mean won! Scoreboard read thus 182-2, 40.3 overs. We don’t have Ravi………..

We needed more than 6 runs an over. I know they were not getting wickets, but the other team fielded really well and the bowling was crisp. Will we manage it? I tried to look for Dad, but could not see him.

Jayant came in next and looked very nervous. And yes he left soon after coming without scoring anything. The next two guys also did little to keep cool and went home fast, but they at least ensured that runs kept coming. We were now on the 48^th over and needed 14 runs. Scoreboard read 230 for 5. Krishna had just arrived. Saurabh was easygoing with everyone, but this Krishna guy, well I think he wanted to be the Captain and he hated Saurabh and Saurabh also did not really like him. Krishna played some risky shots and ignored some singles that could have come by. Saurabh came to him before the last over and said. “I am usually not the aggressive one. But if we lose this, I swear I am going to make it very difficult for you!!” Is this my Saurabh? Or for this moment I am no more an object but have a soul, which has entered his body? Krishna looked too surprised and merely nodded.

12 runs required off this over, said the commentator. I was facing the ball. We just managed a single. Krishna as if to prove that match came before anyone else, hit a very good boundary. Then he had a dot ball. Then he managed a single. Ok. I know you all know math, but the effect sinks in when I tell it, 2 balls 6 runs required. Saurabh had a dot ball too. What now? a ball and six runs?!!? Last ball, everyone yelled six-six. We hit it hard and it was going very far, I could see Dad also in that location. (Why he had moved places?) Anyway, it was going and landing in the safe hands of their best fielder Mahendra “Jhonty Rhodes” very near to the boundary. What? We lost the wicket and match?……………

Suddenly I saw Dad jumping? No Ball!! Ok got it, there is still chance and God.

(Some rules of cricket are strange, a ball that is no!! And that D-L method so hated them up until today. Only some wise man made them!)

We faced the last ball and hit it hard; so hard that I chipped of a good portion of mine that went flying to the middle of the ground and could see that the ball carried right up to Dad. (So that is why he changed places! He knew where Saurabh hits the most) He had the ball, Saurabh had the stumps, Krishna still had his pride, I lost some weight and the match ended.

We had made it. As Saurabh went and collected the trophy he said “ I know each one contributed to this match. Dada who made us dream big. Ravi, Krishna and you too Jayant. Just smile!! Thank you so much. I also want to thank my Dad for making his dream mine and being the constant supporter.” Saying so he moved to the side. Just then as if by reflex, he came back to the mic and said. “ I today won the match but lost a part of my companion and my best “match” to date; my bat. I owe this victory to you too my friend and this trophy would someday have to be returned but you will have a place on my trophy wall forever. Cause ours is a match made in heaven.” The feeling is mutual I said while I gave way to the younger generation who would play with him for India. As I sit here on Saurabh’s trophy wall I wait for my cousins to narrate their big day soon to me, I mean to you, Ok Us.…..